Saturday, February 12, 2005

You Know You're Born and Raised in A Small Town When...

• During a storm you check the cattle before you check the kids.
• You are related to more than half the town.
• You can tell the difference between a horse and a cow from a distance.
• Your car breaks down outside of town and news of it gets back to town before you do.
• Without thinking, you wave to all oncoming traffic.
• You don't buy all your vegetables at the grocery store.
• You don't put too much effort into hairstyles due to wind and weather.
• There's a tornado warning and the whole town is outside watching for it.
• The local gas station sells live bait.
• You go to the State Fair for your family vacation.
• You get up at 5:30 am and go down to the coffee shop.
• You're on a first name basis with the county sheriff.
• When little smokies are something you serve on special occasions.
• You have the number of the Co-op on speed dial.
• All your radio-preset buttons are country.
• You try to find the cheapest room rates when going out of town.
• Using the elevator involves a grain truck.
• Your mayor is also your garbage hauler, barber, and insurance salesman.
• You know you should listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit.
• You call the wrong number and talk to the person for an hour anyway.
• Your excuse for getting out of school is that the cows got out.
• You know cow pies aren't made of beef.
• You wake up when it's dark and go to bed when it's still light.
• You listen to "Paul Harvey" every day at noon.
• You can tell it's a farmer working late in his field and not a UFO.
• Your nearest neighbor is in the next area code.
• You know the difference between field corn and sweet corn when they are still on the stalk.
• You know the code names for everyone on the CB.
• You can eat an ear of corn with no utensils in under 20 seconds.
• You wear your boots to church.
• It takes 30 seconds to reach your destination and it's clear across town.
• You can tell the smell of a skunk and the smell of feedlot apart.
• The meaning of true love is that you'll ride in the tractor with him.
• You go to Wal-Mart for your Saturday shopping.
• Your main drag in town is two blocks long.
• You defend the beauty of being able to see the next town which is 20 miles away.

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